Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Who Rained On My Parade?

I am in the most negative, horrific mood ever. Not really that anything happened. Nothing at all happened actually! Why, then, do I feel so down and out?! Things are good! I'm about half way through Internship III, I have great things ahead of me with the new practice, yet all I can think about is how I'm suppose to go to this stupid assembly in 30 minutes and sit there for 2 hours surrounded by people that I have nothing in common with and in a place I don't want to be in. On top of that, my staff doctor seems to have a grudge about having me as an intern because he "wasn't suppose to have anymore tri 9's" and has no problem helping everyone under the sun except for me. Even an alumni came in for me today and he has a nice chat about helping her find space and giving her connections to her community. I feel like an outsider who has to beg for hand outs that noone helps because they don't like her. :( And it's all totally me. It's all my attitude and perception. Tons of people are helping me, yet I can only focus on the negative. I have to change my attitude! Fine. Starting.....now. ;)

4 comments:

Stephanie said...

Oh jen! I do that too. Focus on the negative. Okay. Let's get through this. hehehe. I tell myself over and over that God is bigger than all this. That He wants me to be happy. Then I pray that He will snap their heads off (not really. but I want to). I will pray for ya cuz! Love you.

Jennifer said...

Aw, cheer up Jen! Everything's gonna be o.k.!

Anonymous said...

Oh Jen, I hate those kinds of moods. I often do the exact same thing....focus on ALL the negatives. Somehow I seem to find quite a few, also. But anyway, you need to START focusing on ALL the positives. And you do know there are many. Just start thinking about how you are gonna be OUT soon. Cheer up!! Luv ya!! :)

Anonymous said...

Hey, actually I don't think I am going to Weatherford this weekend. Jeff has to work, so that stinks. Let me know if y'all are coming.